I don’t really do nightwear. I wear an oversized man’s white t-shirt. Think Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction. But less stabby.
Sometimes I really do berate myself for not making more of an effort. I curl up in bed fresh from the bath in my cotton Calvin Klein and imagine the rest of you swanning about like Alexis Carrington in swathes of satin and lace and fluffy kitten heel slippers.
But does any woman actually wear that stuff? I’m not talking occasionally, I mean all the time. Am I letting the side down? Should I be skipping about in a negligee when I have to put the bins out? And why is it exclusively women that are expected to wear the “sexy” stuff to bed? Men don’t slip on their sweats on a Friday night and lament “My poor wife, I never doll myself up anymore”.
I put my feelers out and not a single woman I spoke to said they go all Dynasty for bed so that made me feel better.
One friend said she’d like to sleep naked but fears having to evacuate the house in an emergency in the buff. Something similar actually happened to a relative of mine. She awoke in the middle of the night to the sound of somebody in the actual house (I’d have a heart attack) but instead of hiding under the duvet and dialling 999 like a normal person she stormed out to confront the burglar. Without. A. Stitch. On. Now I do not advise anybody do this. Ever. But she swears she didn’t even realise she was naked. She just saw red and chased the man out of the house. Can you even imagine?
Another friend said she just couldn’t sleep naked once she had children. I agree with this. There’s something about getting up in the night to the cries of a baby and needing to be able to walk about zombie-like and not have to worry about putting a robe on or sucking in your tummy. I mean who can be bothered?
The issue of warmth came up. A lot. I am forever running hot – I must be menopausal or something – but friends of mine do harp on and on about being cold. They pile on the layers in the colder weather. Even IN BED. One friend admitted to wearing bed socks.
Thing is I like pyjamas and I kind of wish I wore them to bed but they’re either too tight/restrictive or too baggy and when I turn over I leave half of them behind and end up getting wrapped up in a sort of pyjama straight jacket.
But of an evening I kind of like putting on what I refer to as “my slouchies”. Something comfy to sit in before I actually go to bed. Boden calls this “loungewear” which sums it up well. I’ve bought their pull-ons for years so I’m bit bored of them now. So essentially this entire blog post is to tell you that I am on the lookout for new pyjamas. Ones that I shall slob about in but not actually sleep in. So by all means email me or tweet me any suggestions if you know of any nice ones.
Also, I will not consider a onesie for even a moment so don’t even try.